The Boss is Gone!

The long awaited weekend arrives!  My husband and I are packed up and ready to go away for the weekend and my sister is coming after work to stay with Mom.  Then a wrench is thrown in the works!  Unexpected snow and ice draws out a 30 minute, 20 mile drive to three hours and my poor sister finally walks in two hours after our planned departure.

That may sound like our weekend got off to a bad start but actually, although we were delayed and traveled through snow and ice ourselves, my sister traveled 20 miles in three hours and we then traveled 283 miles in 6 hours.  I think our trip, while dicey at times, was far easier than what my sister dealt with at rush hour getting to our house!

We got in late – 3 am – but we were able to sleep in this morning and have had a wonderful day.  Tonight we will go to bed and tomorrow we will again sleep in until we are ready to get up.  A perfect weekend!

Meanwhile, Mom has realized that the boss is gone!  Mom has been known to say, “She’s in charge.”  I learned quickly that I couldn’t let her do some of the things she thought she could still do.  To her, washing dishes was accomplished by rubbing her fingers over them in running water – no detergent involved, nor clean hands for that matter.  Given that, I weaned her off those tasks and left her with those that she could do.  It took her a short while to get used to it but now she knows that I am the homemaker and the caretaker.

Steve and I have done our best to handle Mom’s changing sleep/wake schedule.  The gate has been working – Mom took it down not too long ago and Steve added a cross wrapped Velcro strip to make it difficult to open.  We now lock my office door so that she doesn’t have access to things in there and I moved her recliner into her room so that she can sit comfortably in the morning if she gets up before us.  It has been working.

But alas!  The “boss” (me) is gone!  My poor sister!  She woke up this morning to find that Mom had taken the gate down and turned on all the lights, including my bedroom light – and this was all before 6 am this morning. 

I see it often.  If someone stops in, Mom will whisper to me, asking if they will be staying to eat.  When I leave Mom at home with someone, she tests her wings to see if she can get away with ruling the roost in my absence.

So, tonight my sister probably won’t sleep much because she knows Mom can take the gate down.  Steve already has a plan in place though.  By midweek, he will replace the gate with a half door that will have a keyed deadbolt.  Another suggestion from my friends at the forum!